Week 29

7.14.13-7.20.13

continued from week 28…

This answer, this gift from God Almighty required something of me.

In order to receive what He provided I was to humbly tell the truth. The truth, which I didn’t know until that morning. The truth I wanted to blame Ryan for. The truth I wanted Ryan to tell.

But, God put the gift before me, therefore I will unwrap it.

On the phone and with broken breaths I was able to share that we were two months behind on our mortgage payment. Our “angel” caller then let me know a check would be mailed to me and that these monies were a gift, not a loan. There was no extra talking in this call for it was obvious I was needing to be still in the moments that followed in order to receive, in awe and with gratitude, His gift for us.

I knew this gift would not fix our situation but apparently living in His higher ways, receiving His signs and miracles, we are not set on a mission to fix. Instead, we are here to follow, and in our following of Him we will be led along in His abundance, knowing He will meet all our needs and in turn, delight in proclaiming He alone is worthy to receive all our praise.

All this happened before noon. I remember feeling in a way I had never felt before. I was overwhelmed by the experience and just wanted to sit alone in quietness. Emotionally I was all over the place, bouncing from complete and utter awe to anger because it was I who had to share our humiliating truth and overall everything still seems like one big mess.

Ultimately, I had peace because I knew it was His blessed mess and this is what was for us. Wouldn’t you be all over the place too?

This day happened to be a full one, no, no I’m wrong, remembering correctly, they were all full. Just then, I was then needing to pick up Caleb at school and after lunch I ushered the boys into some quiet time, which is when my sister Laura arrived.

to be continued…